The Catholic idea that couples have sex for procreation seems crass before the idea that couples make love to strengthen their bond, deciding whether to procreate or not. For millennia, the Church has oppressed both opposite sex couples and same-sex couples about making love for bonding. If a same-sex couple decides to procreate, the technology is available either through ménage a trios or surrogacy. The same-sex union is more difficult, because of practical considerations, like how to procreate and whether additional risks are involved.
The long term effects on the psychology of children of surrogacy are unknown, but the increased exposure to risk, especially psychological risk, is obvious. The Church’s failure to admit to its mistakes has hurt its ability to help people, both heterosexuals and homosexuals, realistically discover and achieve happiness according to personal preferences. Thus, the Church is retarding humankind’s development of nobility; it should reform, because people, including believers, need the best help they can get.
On a base level, monogamy protects the couple, children, and neighbors from sexually transmitted disease or STD. CDC data indicates that 70% of sexually active citizens are known to carry STD. There are twenty million (6%) new cases each year, mostly among the young. Children learn not what they are told but from their caretakers’ conduct; couples who do the hard, noble work to maintain monogamy set the example the children need to inspire them to reject contradictory behavior they are exposed to in the community, on TV, in the movies, at entertainment events, and by adolescent politicians and other celebrities. Monogamy is difficult, because every person is important and appreciable and it is easy to feel justified to express intensely felt appreciation or attraction; too many people are unprepared for that encounter that can entice them to compromise their promise made, more than to their spouse--to themselves--to be monogamous: to practice fidelity. Failure of personal promises destroys lives. Metaphysical ideas like “soul” and “heaven” have nothing to offer a ruined life. There is no comfort in ruin. Resiliency restores living but does not heal ruin.